Archive for February, 2011

It’s a problem…

{ February 22, 2011 @ 10:27 pm } · { Shananigans }
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I have a problem.  I should say, I’ve had a problem my whole life. 

You see, I’m fat. 

I’ve always been fat.  I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t fat.  I was even born fat! (10 pounds 10 1/2 ounces)

Some of my fat can be explained (rationalized) by the fact that I have a thyroid issue and PCOS (polysystic ovarian syndrome).   I could blame it on my three pregnancies (but truth be told, I actually lost weight when pregnant).  I might want to blame my genetic code, or my parents for making me go on weight watchers when I was 10.  I could blame them all.

But, the truth is that I have no one to blame but myself. 

I have an eating disorder, only not the kind that makes you skinny.  The other kind.  I eat too much.  I binge and don’t purge.  I can’t stop myself.

I have done unthinkable things at times.  I once hid a cake in the bathroom.  I’ve eaten food from the top of the garbage can (just like George on Seinfeld).  I have kept secret “stashes” of food. 

I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad.  I use food to celebrate, I use food to make me feel better.  Oh, and I also use food just to stay awake.   It is a huge problem.  Sometimes I wonder if I’ll really ever be free from it.  It is an addiction of the worst kind. 

I’ve tried many different “diets” over the years.  I’ve lost quite a bit of weight on some of them….but the weight always creeps back on.  I just can’t seem to get this monkey off my back. 

I’ve never really talked about my monkey publicly.  I guess that it’s hard to admit that you have an addiction.  I’m wondering if this might be the key to keeping me accountable for my actions.   I need to go through all 12 steps, I imagine. 

So, step one:  admit you have a problem.  I do.  I really really do.

I heart to heart

{ February 18, 2011 @ 6:43 pm } · { got talent }
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I like Valentines Day.  I don’t care if it’s a Halmark Holiday.  I love to celebrate love. 

I also love to be creative and make homemade Valentines.  That’s right, no store-boughten Valentines for my kids!

Goldfish crackers were on sale, AND I had coupons, which made them very cheap.  I decided to attach a fish valentine to a baggie full for Miles to take to his daycare buddies.

Tessa decided that she wanted to do some little flowers.  We cut hearts from cute paper, punched holes, and inserted a dum dum for the center.  She had fun making them with me, and signed her name on the petals. 

Nathan gave some glow sticks mascarading as arrows through his heart.  The caption read, “You make my heart GLOW”.  He did not enjoy making them, and I had to plead with him to get them finished.  He did them, eventually. 

For the teachers, I bought some heart magnets at the dollar store and packaged them up.   Then, we called them “love magnets”. 

Did I spend way too much time making these Valentines?  Yes.  Were they fabulous?  Yes.  Are you jealous?  Probably.

Eagles Nest

{ February 18, 2011 @ 6:29 pm } · { married with children }
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When I was a teenager, I attended a leadership conference at Snow College.  They took us up in the mountains there where they have developed a “ropes course”, which is a sadistic torture chamber for people like me.  The torture was compoundedd by a lot of peer pressure. 

The very most challenging part of this ropes course was called the “Eagle’s Nest”.  It’s a 50 foot pole with a lazy susan on top.  About ten feet away from the pole was a trapeze bar.  Each person was to put on a very uncomfortable harnass, climb to the top of this pole, stand on the “Eagle’s Nest” at the top, and then jump to the trapeze and hopfully hold on to it. 

I am not only scared of heights, but I’m also extremely clumsy.  I still haven’t gotten over this experience…obviously. 

I climbed the dang pole, I even stood on the top of the “nest”, and then I jumped.  Too bad I closed my eyes, or might have grabbed hold of the trapeze.  Instead, I fell, until the harnass caught my fall. 

I did NOT feel like an eagle.  Just saying. 

Last week, we had the opportunity to see some real eagles nesting at Farmington Bay.  It was “Bald Eagle Day”, so we thought we’d check it out.  It was a fun little outing. 

Nate did not appreciate the fact that these birds were out in the open.  He wanted to see a caged one…up close and personal.  Perhaps next time, we’ll bring some binoculars for him.  They did have a few telescopes to view the eagles, but neither of my children know how to close the correct eye.  They kept closing the eye that was looking into the telescope!  Then, they complained that they couldn’t see the birds.  They were un-impressed and wanted to leave.  I took their picture first:

The kids felt better about the whole experience once we found our way to the visitor’s center.  Tessa made an eagle finger puppet and Nate got to stretch out his arms to measure them against an eagle’s.  We finished off with a little nature walk where Tessa complained and complained about walking. 

Despite my children’s unamusement with this free family outing, I still have to say that it was a lot better than my first experience with an eagle’s nest.

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